you say you love me. So why more than a year down the track haven’t you realised that one of my biggest pet peeves is repeating what i say.
How Breasts Can Look
A little while back, I made a post about the Reality of Nude Photos, and the public reaction that really surprised me in response was that it seemed like a lot of people had never actually seen a female body in different positions like that before. Lots of people didn’t believe that both of the images in that post were really me, because my breasts looked so different in the two pictures.
And that really stuck with me. Not any kind of frustration at the disbelief I received, but a genuinely eye-opening realization that people didn’t know what breasts can look like when they’re just flopped around in a picture or looked at from a different side.
I certainly don’t have the same breasts as every other woman out there, so this is in no way meant to represent all of womankind. Not by a long shot. Breasts come in all shapes and sizes and each woman is unique in the way that they will stretch, sag, move, bounce, and so on. Women have different nipples, different sized areolae, and very differently shaped breasts.
These are my breasts. 12 photos of them just hanging out and doing their thing. Every woman in the world could make this photo chart and it would be a little bit different each time. And in my opinion, that is one of the most wonderful and amazing things about the human body.
THIS IS A GOOD POST THAT A LOTTTTT OF CHICKS I SEE POSTING SOMETIMES ((BEING A BIT DOWN ABOUT THEIR BOOBS)) DON’T REALISE!!!!!
The Reality of Nude Photos
Alright, so this is a little bit of an unrelated note to my regular posts, but I feel like it’s important. I want to take just a quick minute to explain the difference I see between a naked body that’s posed and a naked body that is just that: a naked body.
When we look at naked people on the internet (be it Porn Stars, “selfies” taken by internet-famous bloggers, or professional freelance models), they are almost always in these poses that elongate the body, stretch out the muscles, show off the ribs, push the breasts forward and hide all of those squishy rolls that happen when we relax. I am not attacking them, so please don’t feel defensive if those are the kinds of photos you are a part of. They’re beautiful, I have no problem with them. I just feel called to point out that a body that looks so “sexy” or “slender” or “desirable” in one picture, can look squishy, vulnerable and saggy in the next just by letting go of a pose. No one wants to post those pictures, those are the ones you delete before they’re even out of the camera. No one wants to say, “Hey! Here’s a selfie of how my tummy puffs out and look, can you see the stretch marks on my breasts!?”
I took both of those pictures this morning, minutes apart. They’re both me. They’re both completely unedited. They are simply meant to show the difference between a body that is carefully designed to be sexy and well-received, and a body that is just sitting there being a naked body on a bed in the morning.
I’m not saying that people shouldn’t pose in photos, or that photos designed to look sexy are bad whatsoever, so please don’t think that’s what I’m getting at. I just felt like sharing a picture of what a body really looks like sitting on a bed, instead of an image of what a body looks like carefully posed on a bed.
Miss Mosh ~ Lynda Kay “I Put A Spell On You”
I can feel wings on my back. I found myself staring at pictures of self harm. I can’t seem to eat normally. My anxiety is so bad I haven’t slept well in weeks.
And all I can think of is dear gods, please. Not this shit again.
So I’m at the point where I’m dangerously calm and I just want to have a bath and just lay under the water for a while. Who knows maybe I’ll learn how to breath in water instead of air.
The worst part about being calm like this, is there is always that little part of me screaming and saying it isn’t good, that being like this is dangerous. that i am a danger to myself like this.
And I have no idea if that part of me is common sense or anxiety.
hahahahahaha dear god I don’t remember the last time I was this triggered to self harm.
Last week was shit.
I started to purge again.
I hardly got out of bed.
I either binged or didn’t eat.
I almost lost the guy I’m in love with.
My head is so crowded.
Life is shit and getting shitter.
And I feel so dirty and useless.